There’s a tendency to think of trauma as a major life event or a deep violation of privacy, but actually trauma can take different forms and affect people in different ways.
Trauma is any unpleasant experience which undermines your sense of safety and interrupts your capacity to thrive and flourish to reach your highest potential. For example, trauma might be as dramatic as being involved in a car accident, or as subtle as growing up in a highly critical or unhealthy family environment.
It can be a significant one-off event, or repeated exposure to more minor but similarly damaging traumas that recur over a period of time.
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4 key points
- Trauma can take many forms, and does not necessarily prevent you from succeeding in life
- Trauma can affect you in ways that you may not realize are connected to past experiences
- Sometimes, trauma can even drive your success in life, but it also brings with it hidden costs: to your relationships and your emotional wellbeing
- You can continue to succeed in life, and also heal what’s not serving you through specialized therapy
Signs of unresolved trauma
Some signs of unresolved trauma can include:
- Being a high achiever and still feeling inadequate
- Frequent exhaustion, perfectionism and a need to be in control at all times
- Digestive problems (your digestive health can indicate your emotional wellbeing such as your ability to relax)
- Insomnia (difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep for the night) is common in people with unresolved trauma
- Unhealthy habits, especially around food and self-soothing behaviors that you’ve developed to cope with uncomfortable emotional experiences
- Stronger emotional reactions to events, feeling easily threatened and that you have to defend yourself
- A tendency to experience depression or anxiety
Trauma does not necessarily prevent you from succeeding in life
There is a misperception that if you’ve endured trauma, that you must struggle to cope with life and function effectively in the world. There’s certainly some truth to that, depending on the type and severity of trauma experienced. However, you might have endured trauma on some level, while still being able to persevere through life’s challenges to become quite successful in life, establishing a good career and developing yourself personally. However, unresolved trauma will often continue to affect you in subtle ways that only you may, or may not, even realize are the result of trauma.
Trauma can affect you in ways that you may not even realize are connected to past experiences
Even if you’re highly accomplished, have amassed impressive academic or professional credentials, you may continue to struggle with some things on a very private level, so that those around you aren’t even aware of. In fact, you might even know that you struggle with certain challenges, without understanding why they’re such a struggle for you.
Some of the more common ways in which trauma may continue to affect you include:
- Difficulty forming or developing close relationships
- Issues around food and eating
- Perfectionism and needing to feel in control
- Depression and anxiety
- Finding it hard to relax and enjoy life
- Struggling with self-worth and low self-esteem, and the need to prove yourself
In some cases, trauma can drive your success in life, but it brings with it hidden costs: to your relationships and emotional wellbeing
If you’re a high-functioning individual, you might subconsciously try to distract yourself from deep-seated trauma by investing yourself fully in achieving academic and professional excellence. In this way, trauma can actually drive your success, although it comes at a cost. Distracting yourself with your work can help you succeed, but it doesn’t help you work through past pain, or deepen your relationships.
Resolving your trauma does not mean giving up your drive to succeed. Not at all! You deserve to be proud of your success in life and should continue to push yourself to succeed, in ways that are good for you. At the same time, recognizing those areas that aren’t going as well for you is a valuable opportunity to enhance your life.
Therapy is an effective tool that can be used in conjunction with self-care strategies to fully heal and move forward in life
If you’ve developed unhealthy habits or coping strategies to deal with life’s challenges, it’s important that you address any underlying traumas that are holding you back so that you can move forward in life, in as healthy a way as possible. It’s important to practice self-care, such as getting enough sleep, exercising regularly, and eating a healthy diet. But even the best self-care strategies won’t resolve latent trauma until you do the work to heal them.
Professional therapy is proven to be highly effective in helping you heal from past traumas, and work through any coping mechanisms you’ve developed along the way that are preventing you from living the best life you can. In this way, you truly get the best of both worlds: you enjoy the success you’ve worked hard to accrue, and also heal those parts that need healing, so that you can finally enjoy your life to the fullest!
Start your journey today
Mandy Wigren provides effective therapy for trauma, anxiety, depression, and more in Michigan. Reach out today to schedule your free consultation.